Hi, friends. It seems that I’ve somehow (and bizarrely) become the target of a campaign of harassment and defamation by a small but loud group of “anti-CRT,” anti-vax, anti-mask, anti-trans, abusive activists. I’m not going to spend much time defending myself from fabricated claims, but wanted to put this here […]
wellness and growth
14 posts
In polyamory, there are unique challenges that people may experience with regard to intimate partner abuse. Certain elements of polyamory may make it more difficult to spot abuse. Polyamorous people and service providers who are aware of these common concerns and challenges will be better prepared to prevent abuse and […]
I love community-based consent and sexuality education and prevention work, and have been engaged in it for years now, in queer, flow arts, and movement communities. Over that time, I’ve also been working in rape crisis centers on hotlines and facilitating support groups, with access to training and professional development […]
Take up space. As the cycle of the seasons moves through mystery and the glow of a new calendar year fills the horizon, know this: you are allowed to take up space. You will have days where you feel broken. Pour tenderness over your missteps and inadequacies. Love them sweetly. […]
This post is an expansion of a post published at the website of the North Carolina Coalition Against Sexual Assault. I was at a recent gathering of crisis workers when the topic of conversation switched to self-care. With enthusiasm, each of the attendees began to tell us their favorite activities. […]
There’s this thing that happens to advocates when the world around us burns with injustice and fury and we shift into what we know, the holding-fighting, fierce-eyed, tender-hearted caring that pours out compassion and links lives with survivors, shedding trails of sweetness as it goes. It’s a professional skillset and […]
Recently, a friend made plans to come over to cowork a bit before a meeting. I had an hour to myself before my friend arrived, and I decided to take time for myself, time to soothe. I work full time in a field rife with vicarious trauma, and have spent […]
Breathe. When the times and spaces where you normally find your breath are dripped and then drenched and then flooded with disclosures and no space is air space… open up space, small space, enough space, and breathe. Pace yourself. One foot in front of the other, each step only as […]
Seventy-two hours out of every week, I carry a hotline phone. While calls come in waves and some shifts are silent, my everyday and professional lives are peppered with reminders that evil doesn’t just pierce reality through acts of power, control, and violence – it seeps through in discrediting voices […]
Some of the most brutal weapons ever used against me were crafted and wielded by my own hands, forged in grief and self-loathing out of the words of others. In my better moments, I recognize that while another’s frustration with me frequently may be justified, any cruel words towards me […]
Before moving to start a new life as a single mom a few states away with my infant son, I visited the convent. One of the sisters to whom I had become especially close was nearing the date when she’d take her final vow – that of poverty. She gave […]
For several years, I was a leader in New Thought churches that held strict adherence to the “Law of Mind-Action” – that we change the blueprint of the universe to manifest according to our thoughts and beliefs – and the “Law of Attraction” – that we attract all experiences into […]